I remember my first two-month trip out of the country to the Philippines. I lived in a three-bedroom house with forty women and children. Between all the people and the traffic, there were days it just seemed so loud.  I had no place to get away, which was in stark contrast to my single dwelling home, where I lived alone, in Texas. 

I couldn’t walk anywhere without an escort, not even to the church just a few blocks away. One day I forgot something at home and an eight-year-old boy escorted me back and forth. 

I ate things I had never eaten before. The night I saw over a dozen chicken heads in the frying pan I panicked. How do you eat that? I had already eaten squid for the first time and bitten into the ink sac. Everyone had a good laugh at my expense. What a relief when I heard we had to skip dinner and just buy some bread from a store across from the church before the youth service. 

As I shared with the youth group that night, I used an illustration involving pancakes. The youth pastor, and my translator, looked at me with a blank stare. I realized I needed  another illustration. I should have known; I’d been there long enough to realize breakfast and many other food items were not the same as in the U.S. Did I mention the chicken heads? I picked another illustration, but I don’t think it worked as well. 

One of the challenges in communication on that trip, like in other places I’ve traveled, was having the ability to speak the national language, in this case English, but many people used other local languages. But even when we were speaking English, our use of words differed and caused confusion, misunderstandings, and even hurt, at times. It took intentionality and work to figure it out. 

I later realized if I had used the word hot cakes the youth pastor and group would have known exactly what I meant. I’ll remember that for the next trip. But for now, I’m remembering this quote by George Bernaw Shaw: “The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.” 

How do you work at communication?